I was taught by the society that I was automatically deserving of adulation and wealth. Not only that, if I did something wrong, or wasn’t exactly who I wanted to be, then the fault did not lie with me, but with my environment, the economy, the government, or mystical structures of oppression. Hard work has no intrinsic value. Neither does integrity or modesty. Good and bad decisions, good and bad character, are a matter of brain chemistry and external influence. You don’t need to develop a craft before you begin promoting yourself. It doesn’t matter what you do, as long as you take lots of pictures of it and talk about it all the time. Create innumerable profiles of your idealized self, talk about traveling, rock climbing, yoga, and netflix. You will not be recognized as human unless you mention that you too need the IV soporific of nightly netflix to dim the awareness of your damnation in digital hell.
I am constantly networking, and by that I mean looking for casual sex on the internet. I still say that I am “on the internet” as if it isn’t the air we all breathe now, the omnipresent background of our lives. No one can any longer imagine what life was like 20 years ago; at the same time primitive man has been fetishized and held up as a model of the good life to which we should aspire. Atomized individuality works really well for irremediable narcissists, everyone else longs for savage group membership. Branding is crucial, without it your actions might define you, and that is the last thing anyone wants. Internal acceptance of who you are is much more important than what other people can clearly see in the light of day. The idea that there is an objective reality resistant to our wishes is oppressive. Truth is determined by the magnitude of outrage and offense taken by the most currently coddled and pitied minority.
If you don’t like something, if a fact makes you uncomfortable, change the subject. All we have are disparate vocabularies, one no better than the other. Well, some are better than others, but that all depends on your identity. If someone believes something you don’t like, casually suggest it’s because they have insidious motives, and that their vested interests distort their perception of justice. You, on the other hand, when you call for more money and things for yourself, for an even easier life where you get more for contributing less, are an impartial observer of the immutable form of equity. Aggrieved mobs are always justified in their riotous, uncivil behavior, regardless of the fact that the typical outcome of violent protest and uprising is destruction of property, theft, and the elevation of a Strongman into a position of power. If you want your own space, however small it may be, you’re a selfish bourgeois sell out. A true new soviet human prefers to huff the ass vapors of his fellow soviets in sewage stained tents. Wanting another person to commit themselves to you sexually is objectifying, merging two lives into one for the purpose of raising the next generation is archaic and repressive, but rapidly forming tenuous relationships with people solely for the pleasure that their genitals bring you is progressive.
I am a modern man, which is to say no man at all. I am evolving into a creature that worships my own whims knowingly and enthusiastically. My ancestors rot while I wantonly spill my seed in the dust. Weak spine, weak knees, slithering, a smooth and untouchable facade behind which a nameless, faceless rage awaits its moment of glory.